the reluctant lobotomist (fourfreedoms) wrote,
the reluctant lobotomist

Of satin dressing gowns and stolen cheerio boxes

[ mood | oh no you din't! ]
[ music | Super Massive Black Hole-Muse ]

Florence and I got our lit to life scene over with. Let me just say, I love Oscar Wilde and The Importance of Being Earnest I managed to fall off my chair when I was supposed to without killing myself and we didn't completely destroy the cheerio box. However, if I ever had any respect for Linda Li, it's all gone now. She fucked up everything, and then attempted to blame us. Flo was furious, I've never seen her so openly insult people before (not that Brian Han counts since he probably didn't understand her jab).

Anyway, in a bizarre attempt to cheer myself up, I did this leetle crack. survey stolen from xtinethepirate

First, write down the names of 12 characters. Then read and answer the questions. You can't look at the questions (or click on the cut) until you write down the 12 characters you're going to use.

1) John Preston, Equilibrium
2) Connor MacManus, The Boondock Saints
3) Brian Kinney, Queer as Folk
4) Johnny Storm, The Fantastic Four
5) Julian Sark, Alias
6) Murphy MacManus, The Boondock Saints
7) Wilhelm Grimm, The Brothers Grimm
8) Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow
9) Jacob Grimm, The Brothers Grimm
10) Sean McNamara, Nip/Tuck
11) Joe uh . . .he doesn’t have a last name, Bend It Like Beckham
12) Edmund Bertram, Mansfield Park

like xtine, I included pictures under the cut.

1) John Preston, Equilibrium

2) Connor MacManus, The Boondock Saints

3) Brian Kinney, Queer as Folk

4) Johnny Storm, The Fantastic Four

5) Julian Sark, Alias

6) Murphy MacManus, The Boondock Saints

7) Wilhelm Grimm, The Brothers Grimm

8) Ichabod Crane, Sleepy Hollow

9) Jacob Grimm, The Brothers Grimm

10) Sean McNamara, Nip/Tuck

11) Joe uh . . .he doesn’t have a last name, Bend It Like Beckham

12) Edmund Bertram, Mansfield Park

1) Have you ever read a six/eleven fic? Do you want to?

Some how I don’t think Joe would have much time for trigger happy albeit sexy vigilante (Murphy), maybe they could both bond over being Irish. I don’t particularly think this would be a good couple

2) Do you think four is hot? How hot?

Uh, Johnny Storm is the human torch so he’s pretty damn hot. Oh you mean would I fuck him? Heehee. Yeah, it certainly wouldn’t take persuading.

3) What would happen if 12 got 8 pregnant?

Edmund would be disowned as he is a worthless second son, and people might look at Ichabod even more strangely than they did before. I’m also pretty sure that Edmund would face some moral dilemma due to the fact that he is a parson. Not quite sure what he’d tell his parish.

4) Can you rec any fics about 9?

Oh, I’m going to get into so much trouble with this.

Aya. Raven’s “Sang” is a good story about the *ahem* relationship between Wilhelm and Jacob (you know you’re in trouble if incest has stopped bothering you). She also updates like clockwork.

5) Would 2 and 6 make a good couple

Hey, whoa that’s kinda funny. Connor and Murphy together, another incestuous couple, which I admit, I have written in the past. My point, yes they would make a good couple. Hey it’s not like they can have deformed kids!

6) Five/Nine or Five/Ten?? Why???

Let’s see Sark with Dr. McNamara or Sark with Jacob? Yeah I don’t think Sark and Jacob would get along. Actually I think Sark would put a few bullets into Jacob after an hour spent in his company. I think he’d like Sean though, because Sean’s talented and Sark has an affinity for those kinds of people. Also Sark is like a snarkier version of Christian, so I’m pretty sure it would work out. They would get into very sexy shouting matches I imagine.

7) What would happen if 7 walked in on 2 and 12 having sex? If Wilhelm walked in on Connor and Edmund having sex he’d probably laugh his ass off, make a few dirty comments, and then turn around and walk right out so that they could finish.

8) Make up a summary for a 3/10 fic . . . Brian Kinney and Sean McNamara? That’s actually not that farfetched. Okay, yes it is.

Brian Kinney is attacked after one of his routine one-night stands, leaving him even more mentally and physically fucked up than he was before. He winds up on Dr. Sean McNamara’s operating table for facial reconstructive surgery. Along with repairing his face without a single scar (I swear Sean has a success rate of %100, he has to be on hallucinogenic drugs to fuck up), the kind but lonely doctor manages to repair Brian’s battered soul. Justin doesn’t stand a chance, I mean who can compete with Scalpels, scrubs, and the man’s whacko jacko lookalike son?

9) Is there any such thing as 1/8 fluff?? Ichabod Crane and John Preston sitting in a tree . . .No I really DON’T think so. John’s son could probably beat Ichabod up, and I don’t think John would sleep with someone who couldn’t at least manage to throw him through a few walls or attack him with pens occasionally.

10) Suggest a title for a 7/12 hurt/comfort fic Hah. Will would be so useless in an h/c situation although I could imagine Edmund getting all angsty and depressed. Maybe You Break, You Buy.Muahahahah. I’m not sure why I find that so amusing.

11) What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted 4 to deflower 1??

Johnny and Preston, well, I suppose they could drive each other nuts and then we could have hot insane asylum sex! No kidding. I would get them in a sparring match and then have it get just a litte too heated. It would more be as an expression of power than for the sake of having sex. Granted, the only way Johnny could possibly win would be to go all flame boy on Preston, which might make it rather crispy.

12)Does anyone on your flist read 7 slash? Not anyone that I know of. I think I’m the only one *ducks flying objects* I’m sorry that I think two brothers are OTP. I can’t help it. You go watch that movie!

13) Does anyone on your f list write or draw 11? Nope. Joe’s not terribly slashy. There’s already enough drama with Jules. God knows what would happen if we added a little fairy into the potion.

14) Would anyone on your firends list write 2/4/5??Urh. No, there’s now way you could write that without a strong ideological clash. Connor and Johnny are both heroes, and Sark is definitely a villain. Connor might sleep with Sark for the sole reason of killing him afterwards, but I’m sure that violates some commandment or bible tenet somewhere so probably not.

15) What might 10 scream at a moment of extreme passion? Sean would shout out “CHRISTIAN”. Kidding. Sean is actually a little reserved so I doubt you could get him to shout anything.

16) If you wrote a song-fic about 8, what song would you chose?
“I hear Noises” by Tegan and Sara. Ichabod is, after all, a very perceptive madman.

17) If you wrote a 1/6/12 fic, what would the warnings be??warning: EXTREME VIOLENCE. Preston and Murphy together? Yeah, Edmund, I hope you don’t mind going around randomly killing people, Preston technically is a priest too, so you won’t have to feel bad at least on that count.

18) What might be a really good pick-up line for 2 to use to 10? As if Connor and Sean would give each other the time of day. Well, if Connor suddenly decided the good doctor was hot, what might he say? “I imagine ye know how to kill man with tha’ knife *suggestive glance*, would ye like to show me?”

Then Sean would blink, grab Christian, and scream, “MOMMY, intimidating sexy Irishman just hit on me!”

19) When was the last time you read a fic about 5? Ooh, I read a Sark ficcie over a year ago. It was more of a joke than anything, because it was Jack/Sark/Will (no not Jack Sparrow and Will Turner) and it was inspired by the episode where Sark tortures Will and then Jack rescues him. CLEARLY the formula for love.

20) What's 6's super secret kink?? Murphy’s super secret kink is Connor. Oh damn, that’s not a secret! *ducks more flying objects* Hmm, I imagine he’s got some ideas about those jail cells.

21) Would 11 shag 9? Drunk or sober? I could maybe see Joe shagging Jacob if they were really drunk. But then Will would find them and beat Joe up and that would be bad bad bad.

22) If three and seven get together, who tops? Brian ALWAYS tops. So I guess that answers that. Sorry, Will, bottoms up, eh?

23) "One an Nine are in a happy relationship until Nine suddenly runs off with Four. One, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night-stand with Eleven, and a brief unhappy affair with Twelve, then follows the wise advice of FIve and finds true love with Three"

"Preston and Jacob are in a happy relationship (define happy) until Jacob suddenly runs off with Johnny Storm (I suppose I could see Johnny whisking him away and then lighting him on fire by accident). Preston, broken-hearted, has a hot one-night-stand with Joe (yeah with two people as beautiful as they are, how could they go wrong!), and a brief unhappy affair with Edmund (yeah, I don’t think Edmund would be able to deal with Preston’s self-loathing), then follows the wise advice of Sark (which would be what? Kill everybody who looks at you funny?) and finds true love with Brian (wow, it really isn’t Justin’s night)"

Title: A moral expostulation on why you shouldn’t take drugs!
whimsicalwonder would read it just so that she could laugh at me, klgrem would read it for moral support, and okaypanic would read it out of sheer boredom and maybe for blackmail material later in life.

Who would write this shite? I WOULD!

Okay, I'm going to try not to kill various members of my student body, after all, I only have to see them for two more weeks and then I'm done.

Tags: the importance of being earnest.
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