the reluctant lobotomist (fourfreedoms) wrote,
the reluctant lobotomist

Fic: The Little Black Book

Title: Little Black Book
Author: fourfreedoms
Pairing: Jared/Jensen
Word Count: 1,751
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Jared figures out his love for Jensen through the little things.
Notes: What the fuck, yo? You people are getting way more mileage out of these drabbles than you deserve! This is from earthquakedream's prompt: J2; notebooks, and also dontyouwaitup saying she missed non-au J2 schmoop. I'm not sure it counts, but uh, it's non-au, and when do I EVER do that?

Jensen carries a notebook around for grocery lists, memos, and his random thoughts on life or whatever. Jared doesn't think about it that much, but he notices that it’s always on the inside pocket of Jensen’s jacket. When he needs it it's always on hand. If he could get away with sticking it in Dean’s jacket, he probably would.

“So if you wanna call me sometime?” their waitress says to Jensen after topping up his coffee.

Jensen had misplaced his cell-phone and quickly scrawled the girl’s number in the notebook with a pen he borrowed from Jared.

“Sure,” he says with that slow smile that makes girls squirm.

Jared grins behind his paper.

“I know you’re grinning at me,” Jensen tells him when she leaves.

Jared folds his paper before saying primly, “Danneel should break up with you.”

Jensen sips his coffee. “She did, yesterday.”

Jared puts his chin on his fist. “Yeah and you’ll be together again tomorrow.”

“Well, so, during my one day of singledom, I go out with that girl, have fun, and then we’ll be back together. I won’t even have cheated.”

Jared laughs. “This is what women mean when they say we think with our dicks.”



Jensen furiously scribbles away in the notebook between scenes. He’s getting to the end of it, handwriting cramped to save pages. He'll need a new one soon.

Jared runs his fingers through his hair, forgetting all they product they’ve put in to simulate gore, and looms over Jensen. “What are you writing? Song lyrics?”

Jensen looks up and blushes.

“What? Really!” Jared wants to yank the notebook away but he learned early on that Jensen will piss in his water bottle and tell him it's lemonade if he does that. “Were you inspired by Castiel waxing rhapsodic about the might of God?”

Jensen glares at him.

“Oh my god, you’re not joining a goth band are you?”

“Shut up, Jared.” Jensen tucks the book back into his messenger bag.


They’re on a long drive for location shooting and passing the notebook back and forth for hangman.

“Jared, what is this? A quote?” Jensen whacks him with the flat of his palm. “You can’t play with quotes.”

Jared starts to draw the arms and legs on the little man hanging off the gallows.

“No, no! I take it back, a quote it is!”

Jared looks up and grins. “Any guesses?”

Jensen offers, “L?”

Jared writes in two. He looks up expectantly. Jensen guesses both 'your's, the or, and the life pretty quick, he cannot figure out the second word in the sentence.

“L-blank-P-I-N-E-S?” He glares at Jared. “What?”

“Oh, come on, what’d you do as a child?”

“I never L-Blank-P-I-N-E-ed anyone!”

“Fine,” Jared snorts and draws the last letter in. “There!” He pushes the notebook back to Jensen.

“ ‘Your lupines or your life?’” Jensen reads. “No, I can tell you, I never lu-pined as a child.”

“Lu-PIN,” Jared corrects. “Oh come on! Monty Python’s Flying Circus? Dennis Moore?”

Jensen looks at him blankly.

“Oh, don’t tell me you’re one of those assholes who thinks Woody Allen is comedy?”

Jensen opens his mouth.

Jared interrupts. “No, it’s better not to know!”

“Annie Ha—”



The first time they go grocery shopping together Jensen writes down everything they need in the notebook. It’s a new one. Leather-bound this time. A present from Danneel before one of their many break-ups.

Jensen has all sorts of stuff like that around the house, like the awesome transformers t-shirt he wears when he's being lazy.

“You like it? Yeah, it’s a gift from Danneel for finding her G-Spot the first time we made it,” he said, one ride to set.

“Dude,” Jared exclaimed, “need to know basis, okay?”

Jensen laughed and flipped him the finger.

Jared doesn’t know what inspired the leather-bound volume, but he’s betting multiple orgasms.

Jensen grabs two cases of beer that aren’t on the list and lets Jared consult it for ingredients on the steak marinade they’re barbecuing later for their housewarming.

No matter what the fangirls say, he’s never felt married to Jensen until Jensen scoops out the Quik chocolate powder he secreted into the cart. “What are you? Four? You cannot have this.”


Jared never brings girls home. He can’t bring himself to do it. It just doesn’t feel right. When he gets back at two in the morning Jensen points this out. He sits at the marble counter in the kitchen, glasses sliding down his nose, and the little notebook lying open in front of him.

Jared shrugs. “I don’t want to sexile you.”

Jensen puts his chin on his fist. “It’s your house.”

Jared pours himself a glass of milk and changes the subject. He has Strawberry Quik hidden in the spice cabinet. He pulls it out and stirs it into the milk. Jensen’s nostrils flare when Jared takes a sip but he doesn’t say anything. Jared grins and licks off his pink milk-mustache. “So what are you up to?”

“I was just making a list.”

Jared leans back against the opposite counter. “What kind of list?”

“Oh you know, some plans, in case Supernatural gets cancelled, and I can’t get hired, and the house burns down, and my car blows up, and I end up cold and alone without food or clothing,” he says quickly.

“Wait, really?”

Jensen shrugs.

“How did I not know this about you?”

Jensen pulls his glasses off and rubs at his eyes. “I was hiding it until after we renewed the lease, but you caught me.”

“You know you have nothing to worry about?” Jared says, setting his glass down and leaning close to Jensen.

“Yeah?” Jensen says, smile beginning to twist his lips.

Jared nods. “Yeah, because if any of that stuff happens I’ll just pimp you out to make rent!”

“Asshole,” Jensen says, fondly.


Jensen tackles him. “Fuck you, I’m not old!”


They’re out at a club back in LA with Mike who’s reminiscing left and right about Tom. They sit around the table, slumped, hoping he’ll get the point.

“You know once Tom…”

“Yes! We were there!” Jensen interrupts.

Mike smiles. “Wait ‘til they cancel that show you’re on, you’ll be whining about how much you miss Jared’s dick, and I won’t listen!”

“I’d have to know it to miss it!” Jensen protests at the same time that Jared says, “You weren’t moaning about Tom’s dick!”

“Firstly, lies, and secondly, we don’t have the same relationship as you two!”

“We don’t have the same relationship as us two either!” Jensen says, slumping back in his seat.

Mike shakes his head and points his bottle of Dos Equis at Jensen. “And that’s what’s known as a faulty syllogism.”

“Don’t pretend to know what that means,” Jared says. He keeps his eyes on a girl by the bar. She’s been staring at him and then turning away, playing coy.

“Fuck you, unlike you two clowns, I went to college!”

Before they can reply the girl walks over. She’s got a blunt cut and Jared’s really been digging the short hair recently. “So I’m going out on a limb here, but uh can I give you my phone number?” she asks Jared as Mike and Jensen give her the up and down.

Jared blinks and pats his pockets. “Shit, I don’t have my cell-phone, sorry.”

“You want my notebook?“ Jensen offers.

Jared waves it off and she scrawls it on a napkin.

“Thanks,” Jared says and tucks it into his right front pocket.

She colors and goes back to her friends.

Mike looks at them both. “You’re totally gay married—or you would be if prop 8 hadn’t passed.”

“Or if we were like, actually gay?” Jensen replies.

“Pssh, who ever let bodies get in the way.”

Jared shakes his head. “Whatever, I’m going to call her.” He grins at Jensen. “As soon as you call my cell phone so I know where the fuck it is.”

Mike sighs and shakes his head. “Don’t go looking for love where you aren’t going to find it. Your mama taught you better.” He puts his coat on and leaves.

Jared says, “That was unexpected.”


“You know, I’ve been thinking,” Jared says one day when they’re at the park with the dogs, tossing them an aged tennis ball. “Do you take that book with you everywhere?”

“You know I do.” Jensen pops up on underhand throw that Sadie tries to catch.

Jared says, “No I mean, like everywhere—like if you didn’t have to change into those paper gowns in the doctors' office, it would still be on your person?”

“It’s not like I strap it to myself while I sleep.”

“No I know,” Jared says quickly, “it’s just, when I think about you, I think about that notebook.”

Jensen shades his eyes. “When I think of you I wonder how many times you were hit with the ugly stick.”

Jared laughs. “Oh you know me, I started at the top of the tree and hit every branch on the way down.”


He thinks about what Mike said for a long time. Eventually, when Jensen pulls out his notebook to write down directions, he figures it out.

“Am I breaking up with Danneel today?” Jensen asks breathlessly when Jared shoves him into his trailer.

Jared smiles but doesn’t answer. He’s too busy calculating what the best surface for attaining mutual orgasm is. Jensen kisses him and he throws it all to chance.

He thinks perversely, “What’ll Sandy say?” when Jensen’s tongue is in his mouth, but then he hitches Jensen in close, lets his eyes slip closed. It’s funny to know a person so well and not know this.

Jensen hisses when Jared’s fingertips find their way under his shirt. He grinds against Jared’s thigh and clutches Jared’s head by the curling hair at the nape of his neck. There’s a long tingling line running down Jared’s spine and it only gets worse when Jensen starts sucking on his lower lip, teeth grazing it.

He breathes hard through his nose, and does his best to anchor Jensen against him. Jared feels like a novice compared to Jensen in a lot of things, but not in this. Neither of them have ever done this.

Jensen pulls back and rather than saying what the fuck are we doing? Who’s on the ass end of this? He says, “I can’t believe you didn’t spit out your chewing gum.”


And, as a bonus, the song I was listening to as I wrote this... "Chip Off The Block" by IMA Robot
Tags: fic, ficbits, first time, j2
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